Head of Swindon Borough Council, Roderick Bluh, announced today that the town of Swindon, Wiltshire is now completely fascist, following a 3-month campaign by the town’s most influential people. The final piece of the puzzle, according to Mr. Bluh, was the introduction of Paulo Di Canio as Swindon Town FC’s new manager.
“It’s been a long and arduous campaign,” said Mr. Bluh this afternoon. “We started 3 months ago by hiring young white youths to graffiti anti-communist slogans all around town. We then set up a meeting between all MP’s and members of the council in the Swindon area and agreed to a totalitarian governing system in the town. Then we demolished the Brunel shopping center and replaced it with a labour camp for our enemies.”
“It was then essential to our plans that Mr. Di Canio take over the vacant managers role at the football club. We lent heavily on the club’s chairman, and it was sorted. We now have a poster boy for our fascist state.”
When asked about which towns and cities they were opposed to in the surrounding area, Mr. Bluh said, “We’ve never really like Oxford, they’ve always been so liberal and so forward thinking, and that is not the Swindon way. But Paulo absolutely detests Bristol. Apparently he was accosted in a Yates wine lodge in their city centre a few years back. On his say so, we will declare war on Bristol. Especially as Swindon are in the same division as Bristol Rovers next year.
Swindon appears to have started a trend of towns and cities taking up radical political structures. There have been rumours that Cardiff is to turn communist after Tiger Tiger was mown down to make way for a bike factory. They have reportedly been trying to obtain the services of Georgi Kinkladze to manage their football team, which would complete the move over to communism.
For more go to http://thehaddock.co.uk/
No comments:
Post a Comment